I have lots of fear: not able to communicate well because i am scare of the crowd and with my bad English spoken. Fear of stranger, not a really out spoken person. But people who know me, I will be totally different. Have been asking myself why am I like that ?! I can't even find any answer for myself. 

I have my own dreams but somehow I am different from many people. People tend to aim and work hard for their dream . But for me I am to afraid to do so, there are too many challenges that I "think" I can't pass through them. Here are my dreams : Being a VET , or things that gonna do with animals :D Or being a forensic investigator or being a dancer [ I think is too late :P ] or being a actress or singer !! hahas really dreaming, sometime i really dream that I am a star !! Come to think of it , why others can ? [ THEY REALLY WORK HARD FOR IT !! Not being a scarily cat like me ]

Most of my dreams seem impossible due to not having any support from anyone. So Is really difficult for me to even work for it. 

Somehow I really need to find courage in myself. HOW ??? 

Furthermore, ever since young I don't really have friends around except in Primary school . Miss those young days of my life. But somehow ever since then, my life change totally upside down. Secondary school times, my out going personality change ! Change to someone who tend to want to attract people attention, but it does not really happen. Soon I become introverted/reclusive, everything seem to not working right ! Keeping everything inside my heart/mind, no one to share with or don't know who to share or scare of sharing. Somehow my second side of myself appear, sometime my mind will have those thoughts that people are saying about me. Feel that I am being left out.... Somehow that what my mind have being since then. Not sure what really happen that totally change myself. 

Friends who are they, what they really mean to us ??? Until now I still have no ideas about that. Treating them as friends but do they really think so ? Here are what happen to me [ Being left out whenever there are meet up, always at their back following them !! worse that are time when my friend need me and I totally support, care. But in the end I was being left out again !! ] In my life I always being left out !! That might be why I always have this negative mindset !! 

My happiest time should be alone! Listening to music that make me happy and starting to daydream !!!

SOMEHOW I love siting in a vehicle and stare outside for a very long time !! I STARTING TO LIKE BEING ALONE, nobody in care and somehow i always keep it to myself !! My BFFs are my phone laptop my bed and my stuffed toys ! 

I have lots of fear: not able to communicate well because i am scare of the crowd and with my bad English spoken. Fear of stranger, not a really out spoken person. But people who know me, I will be totally different. Have been asking myself why am I like that ?! I can't even find any answer for myself. 

I have my own dreams but somehow I am different from many people. People tend to aim and work hard for their dream . But for me I am to afraid to do so, there are too many challenges that I "think" I can't pass through them. Here are my dreams : Being a VET , or things that gonna do with animals :D Or being a forensic investigator or being a dancer [ I think is too late :P ] or being a actress or singer !! hahas really dreaming, sometime i really dream that I am a star !! Come to think of it , why others can ? [ THEY REALLY WORK HARD FOR IT !! Not being a scarily cat like me ]

Most of my dreams seem impossible due to not having any support from anyone. So Is really difficult for me to even work for it. 

Somehow I really need to find courage in myself. HOW ??? 

Furthermore, ever since young I don't really have friends around except in Primary school . Miss those young days of my life. But somehow ever since then, my life change totally upside down. Secondary school times, my out going personality change ! Change to someone who tend to want to attract people attention, but it does not really happen. Soon I become introverted/reclusive, everything seem to not working right ! Keeping everything inside my heart/mind, no one to share with or don't know who to share or scare of sharing. Somehow my second side of myself appear, sometime my mind will have those thoughts that people are saying about me. Feel that I am being left out.... Somehow that what my mind have being since then. Not sure what really happen that totally change myself. 

Friends who are they, what they really mean to us ??? Until now I still have no ideas about that. Treating them as friends but do they really think so ? Here are what happen to me [ Being left out whenever there are meet up, always at their back following them !! worse that are time when my friend need me and I totally support, care. But in the end I was being left out again !! ] In my life I always being left out !! That might be why I always have this negative mindset !! 

My happiest time should be alone! Listening to music that make me happy and starting to daydream !!!

SOMEHOW I love siting in a vehicle and stare outside for a very long time !! I STARTING TO LIKE BEING ALONE, nobody in care and somehow i always keep it to myself !! My BFFs are my phone laptop my bed and my stuffed toys !